Showing posts with label Family Time. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Family Time. Show all posts

Tuesday, 18 December 2012

The Importance of Tradition: A Journal Entry



I love tradition.  I come from and am part of a family of traditions.  Growing up, holidays were always  a time of making the same yummy recipes, putting up the same Christmas tree, visiting the same people, telling the same funny stories, and putting up the same homemade Christmas stockings for Santa to fill.

Photo of Christmas tree with lights and gold and red decorations

As I grew older, I took with me many of these traditions and eventually introduced them to my own family.  One of my favourite tradition is decorating our Christmas tree.  Eight years ago, when we celebrated our first family Christmas together, we began the tradition of going to a local tree farm to buy our Christmas tree. 

Now remember, global warming had not affected the weather as much, so we had something called “snow.”  The tradition began at the house with the pulling on of big coats, boots, hats, mitts and snow pants.  You always hoped you didn't have to go to the washroom!  Our two dogs, Leo and Riley, also had a special outfit for the event.  Both dogs had their sweaters and Christmas bells put on them.  We laughed as they began their dance trying to get the bells off of their legs. 

We all piled into the van and the Christmas sing-song began.  The tree farm was fairly close so in no time we arrived to a very busy scene.  People, trees, dogs and snow.  What a wonderful, chaotic place!  We quickly filed out of the van and rushed to the opening of the farm.  This is where I would put Brianna into the sleigh we had brought and began to “mush.”  With the dogs prancing beside us, we began to inspect the many trees until finding the perfect one.  At a young age, I always encouraged Brianna to be independent.  With my assistance, she would lay down on the cold snow and begin to saw the tree trunk.  Down it would come with a collective “yeahhhh” from all of us.  We always liked to count the rings on the tree to know how old it was.  For some reason, this was important. 

The tree would then be moved onto the sled to be towed back to the point of entry so we could pay for it.  I always loved that walk back.  The cold, the snow falling softly, the sounds of the dogs bells, and the excited chatter of my family.  I felt at peace.

Once we arrived back, we would proceed into the small building to have hot apple cider.  How wonderful it tasted.  Brianna would then walk through the isles of Christmas decorations and pick out the one she would like to take home with her.  Every year, Brianna still picks out one Christmas ornament to adorn the tree.

The tree would then be strapped to the roof of the van, and we would all pile back into it and head for home.  From the roof, it would be moved into the garage for a day so it had time to fall. 

Once it is time to decorate the tree, family members take on specific roles.  Dawn, is the individual who hands out the tree ornaments to Brianna.  She also has the very important job of ensuring the tree is straight and if not, to coordinate the efforts to make it so.  For some reason, our tree always seems to have a bit of a tilt.  Brianna is the “hanger.”  It is her role to take the ornaments from Dawn and then find a special place on the tree for each and everyone.    Dawn usually helps out with instructions from the couch.  My role starts at the very beginning and goes to the end of the process.  It begins by taking out all of the boxes from storage and moving them into the family room.  Then, from the garage, I take the Christmas tree into the house and put it into the tree stand.  Next, I put a string of lights around the tree and make sure it looks even.  Then my girls join me and the decorating begins.

During the time in my life when I travelled around the world for work, I collected Christmas ornaments.  Over the years, I have accumulated some really beautiful and unique ornaments.  Our family tradition is for me to is take each of these ornaments, prior to the their positioning on the tree, and to provide the history of the ornament.  It comes with the where and when I obtained these special treasures.  Each year, bulbs from South Africa, Mexico, England, The Netherlands, Ireland, Texas and Bethlehem are dusted off and placed in their spot of honour. 

The other special bag that is brought out from its box is that containing Brianna's homemade ornaments.  We all laugh and smile as we pick up each ornament and Dawn reminisces of the stories behind the little gems.

The final, most important moment is shared with Brianna and myself.  It is the adorning of the tree with the Christmas angel.  When Brianna was little, I used to lift her up and she would place it on the top of the tree.  But, now that she is 18, I just stand beside her as she does her work.  And of course, a picture is taken of the yearly event. 

Today, the three of us enjoyed this special day of Christmas tree decorating.  Unfortunately, for the last three years we no longer venture to the tree farm but rather buy a pre-cut tree from a lot. 

Today's event was a bit different as we added a new element to it.  For the first time, we video taped it.  Without saying it, we sensed the importance of capturing this beautiful moment this year.  We are keenly aware that we do not know what Frontotemporal Dementia (FTD) will bring over the next year.  In fact this year, a few variations had to take place to work around FTD.  Brianna took over my role of ensuring that the tree was straight and properly secured.  My sense of frustration was high and I found it hard to tighten the tree holder bolts.  Also, there were fewer decorations on the tree this year.  It is so easy to be over stimulated that less is always better - even on the Christmas tree.

I must say a bit of a sense of relief has come to me.  No matter what life brings to me, I know  my stories of the Christmas ornaments will be passed down through generations.    The important tradition of the tree decorating will continue - no matter what. 

Friday, 14 December 2012

12 Days of Health and Wellbeing

Banner image: 12 Days of Health and Wellbeing from the faculty of Applied Health Sciences

As the holiday season approaches, the University of Waterloo’s Faculty of Applied Health Sciences understands that a busy lifestyle and the added demands of the season can put stress on our mind and bodies. Our gifts to you: a reminder to take some time to take care of yourself, and some friendly tips on how to protect and nurture the ultimate gift: your health. 

Watch the videos: 12 Days of Health and Wellbeing

In the Day #4 video, the Director of MAREP, Dr. Sherry Dupuis, suggests ways that you can help make the holiday season more enjoyable and comfortable for older adults in your family.

Watch the video: Supporting Older Adults During the Holiday Season

Happy Holidays!


Wednesday, 28 November 2012

Considerations for the Holidays for Families of Persons with Dementia


  1. Take your time. Synchronize your pace to that of your family member with dementia. The holiday season is about enjoying quality time with family and friends, and excessive entertaining activities can be overwhelming.
  2. Plan one activity at a time. Multitasking can lead to frustration.
  3. Understand if your family member doesn’t seem to appreciate the efforts of preparing an elaborate dinner. They may be happy to just be in your company and get anxious with all of the activity and fuss involved in meal preparation. On the other hand, they might really enjoy helping with the preparations for the holiday meal.
  4. Consider the noise level and multiple distractions. These can impact a person with dementia
    when large groups of family or friends are gathered together and do not be offended if your family member wants to go home immediately after eating dinner.
  5. Be considerate of the words “do you remember.” Do not pressure a person to reminisce and
    remember specifics if the memories do not easily come. Consider reflections based on phrases like “I remember when we used to go to…” or “How I enjoyed that holiday when we….”
  6. Share photo albums of previous holiday celebrations. This can assist with a relaxing form of
    reminiscence.
  7. Allow for a quiet space for a family member with dementia to relax. They may need a brief time to rejuvenate to continue with the activities of the season.
  8. Set priorities and a routine for the holidays in advance. Decide what is most important for you and your family member with dementia and focus on those priorities.
  9. Include the person with dementia in decisionmaking and priority setting around the holiday plans. Listen--really listen--to their preferences and hopes for the holidays.
  10. Have fun!

Thursday, 22 November 2012

University of Waterloo's youngest financial donor continues to support MAREP


In 2008, Boaz Van Veen was four years old. His parents told him about the efforts of the Murray Alzheimer Research and Education Program (MAREP), and he knew immediately that he would give his savings–$170–to support the project founded by his much-loved and admired family friend, "Grampa Ken."

Garage sale
Now, at the age of 8 years old, Boaz knows that the money he earns in various ways–through garage sales, birthday gifts, even contributions from the tooth fairy–can be used for something special, something much bigger than himself.
“Boaz understands that he is fortunate to have so much and that sharing with others is important. He has learned that there is a time for giving and a time for receiving,” 
says Boaz’s mother, Gael Van Veen.  

In the Fall of this year, Boaz raised $295 and donated all of his savings to MAREP again during a special lunch with University of Waterloo President, Feridun Hamdullahpur (October, 2012).
 
Waterloo President, Feridun Hamdullahpur, and Boaz
Boaz, the University of Waterloo’s youngest donor, presented his second gift to MAREP during a special lunch with University of Waterloo President, Feridun Hamdullahpur in October 2012.

Attending the special lunch was also Boaz’s parents (Gael and David Van Veen), MAREP’s founder Ken Murray and his wife Marilyn, and Associate Director of Research, MAREP–Lisa Loiselle.

Ken Murray, Boaz, and Lisa Loiselle










Friday, 28 September 2012

See a movie this weekend!

Are you looking for something to enjoy indoors this weekend with family and friends, now that fall weather is here and the evenings are getting a little crisp? Try out ROBOT & FRANK, a recent  release from the 2012 Sundance Film Festival. Light-hearted and fun, the film also focuses on a near future where highly technological aids make coping with memory loss easier and re-invigorate the lives of everyone affected.

Movie poster for Robot & Frank 2012

Synopsis from the Princess Cinemas website:
An aging thief with a fading memory finds his love for larceny reinvigorated after receiving a companion robot from his concerned son in this tender sci-fi comedy-drama starring Academy Award nominee Frank Langella. Frank (Langella) is a former criminal living out his twilight years in quiet solitude. Though frequent trips to the local library keep him physically active and mentally stimulated, there's little question that his memory isn't what it used to be, and lately his grown children have begun to express concern over the fact that he lives alone. Bestowed a caretaker robot capable of offering engaging interaction and tending to basic household chores, Frank at first resents his android helper. But in time he lets his guard down and begins to actually enjoy the companionship of his new domestic partner. Later, when the future of the local library is threatened, Frank falls back into his old ways and discovers that his robot also doubles as a competent criminal sidekick.

Click here for showtimes on the Princess Cinemas website.
Princess Cinema and Princess Twin Cinema are located at Princess and King Street in Uptown Waterloo.

Tuesday, 24 July 2012

Making Time for Fun.


Sometimes, in the midst of our busy weeks, we all need to make time for a bit of fun.

This week, some of the MAREP team met after work for an evening of Go-Karting. What a great way to connect and build relationships with staff!




How do you unwind, on your own or as a team?

Here are some strategies for coping with caregiver stress and some tips for engaging in leisure with a loved one with ADRD.

Take care of yourselves!

Tuesday, 14 February 2012

It's Valentine's Day!

Happy Valentine's Day, everyone!

I just read this lovely Valentine's blog post by Nurse Virginia Garberding.




What a great time of year to fill our loved one's day with joy. Here are some tips from Virginia to help make the day extra special:
  • When you love to give as well as receive hugs, love to hold hands, and you live “in the moment” every day can be a special occasion
  • Enjoy a sunset, a walk outside, listening to good music, looking at art, or visiting your place of worship
  • A person with Alzheimer’s disease can still enjoy sensory pleasures. They can taste and enjoy chocolates, see a bright red Valentine, smell some memorable perfume or cologne
Wishing you a happy Valentine's Day full of love.

Thursday, 19 January 2012

Living with Alzheimer's.

I came upon this powerful photo essay today and wanted to share it.





Angel Serrano was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's disease, and passed away at the age of 56. In the final years of his life, his family (wife Dioni, daughter Cristina, and son Carlos) devoted virtually all of their time and energy caring for Angel.

Photographer Kenneth O'Halloran spent time with the Serrano family, chronicling their lives and journey with Alzheimer's disease. It is very affecting to witness the power of this family's love for their husband and father. As we know, the role of caregiver is not an easy one.

I hope you find it as beautiful and moving as I did.

Monday, 16 January 2012

When Dementia is in the House

I was really interested to read the first issue of the Canadian Dementia Knowledge Translation Network's (CDKTN) newsletter.
In particular, I'm excited about the launch of a new website called When Dementia is in the House. This website was designed especially for teens and tweens who have a parent or grandparent with dementia.


According to the CDKTN:

This website is based on research, as well as advice from other experienced adolescents. Parents can find guidance on talking to their children about this disease and how to balance parenting with caring for a loved one with dementia.


The website was developed by Dr. Tiffany Chow, MD and Katherine Nichols. Nichols was inspired to speak publicly on the impact that a dementia diagnosis can have on families after her husband was diagnosed at age 59. At the time, Nichols' children were 10 and 12 years old.

Partners on this project include the Canadian Dementia Knowledge Translation Network, Dalhousie University, the Young Carers Initiative, McMaster University, Powerhouse Project, NICE, Baycrest (Rotman Research Institute), Department of Neurology, University of Toronto and The University of California Berkley.
 

Read more about this initiative and how to talk to your kids about dementia at Today's Parent online.

Via Today's Parent

Monday, 19 December 2011

Preventing Anxiety During the Holidays

Photo credit: Geoff Robins/THE CANADIAN PRESS
Recently, two of our project partners were featured in a Globe & Mail article titled, Holidays can trigger anxiety in people with dementia. In sharing their own story, Jim and Linda have imparted several important considerations for people with dementia and their care partners during the holiday season.

Together with the L.E.A.D. Group in Brantford, ON (a day program for persons living with early stage dementia), MAREP has developed the following holiday suggestions:


Holiday Considerations for Persons with Dementia

When visiting with family and friends….

v Limit the number of guests.

v Ask friends and relatives to call before they visit.  This will allow you to prepare yourself.

v Visit during your best time of day.

v Ask friends and relatives to host gatherings.

v Ask host where there is a quiet space you can retreat to if needed.

v Use a calendar or sticky notes to track gatherings.

v Set a reasonable holiday schedule that won’t wear you out – spread visits out over the month.

v Cut back on the number of presents – pick names for gift giving.

v KISS (Keep It Simple Sweetheart).
 
When doing holiday shopping…

v Avoid malls during busy times.

v Set limits - don’t worry about buying gifts for as many people now.  “I only buy for the small children in my family.”

v Send money rather than gifts, OR, give the gift of “Time.”

v Have your spouse/family member to help you shop (give them a list).

v Shop on-line or out of a catalogue to avoid crowded stores.

v Buy stock, bonds or gift-cards.
 
When baking for the holidays…

v Buy already made baked goods from grocery store or bakery.

v Get a family member or friend who like to bake to bake with you or for you.

v Make only the types of baking goods that you really enjoy and you are able to make. “I make fewer things now.” 

v Have family/spouse help by gathering the ingredients or do parts of the baking.  Bake with the children/grandchildren.  This allows them to learn while helping you.

v Use a check-list when baking.  Check off each ingredient you add or step that you complete.
 
When sending out holiday cards to family and friends…

v Make lists (if you have not received a card from someone for over two years, remove them from your list).

v Exchange/share just one card between friends (send 1 card to and from each other each year).

v Send fewer cards over the holidays.  “I only send to relatives who live far away.”

v E-mail or call relatives rather than send cards.  “It is less expensive and I enjoy hearing from relatives and friends at this time of year.”

v Ask friends/ relatives to pass greetings on to others for you.

v Spend “Face Time” instead of writing cards.
 
When preparing meals for the holidays...

v Eat at other family and friends homes.

v Cook less.  Buy a turkey breast rather than a whole turkey, or a prepared holiday meal.

v Eat out!  Some restaurants are open Christmas Day.  No cooking and no cleaning!

v Provide finger foods or have pot luck.


 Holiday Considerations for Families of Persons with Dementia

v Set priorities for the holidays based on what is  most important for you and your family member with dementia.
 
v Take your time – synchronize your pace to that of your family member with dementia. Excessive activities can be overwhelming.
 
v Plan one activity at a time – multi-tasking can lead to frustration for all.
 
v Understand if your family member doesn’t seem to appreciate the efforts of preparing an elaborate dinner or being part of a large holiday party – they may be happy to just be in your company and get anxious with all of the activity involved in the event (e.g., meal prep or large family gathering).

v Consider the noise level and alleviate the  distractions can impact a person with dementia when large groups of family/friends are gathered.  Do not be offended if your family member wants to go home or would like a quiet space to relax.   

v Be considerate of the words “do you remember” – do not pressure a person to remember specifics if the memories do not easily come. Perhaps reflections can be based on “I remember when we used to go to…” or “How I enjoyed that holiday when we….” 
 
v Reminisce during the holidays by sharing photo albums of previous holiday celebrations, or play  favourite holiday movies or music .  

 
 Holiday Considerations for Staff
Working with Persons with Dementia and their Families
 
v Holidays may be a joyous celebration for some and distressing/sad for others. Some persons with dementia may have family/friends who visit and others may be alone. Be sensitive to the needs and feelings of persons with dementia at this time of year.
 
v Take time to learn about the person with dementia – their preferences, culture, religion and ethnicity. Provide opportunities for persons with dementia to celebrate the holidays according to their own preferences (e.g., music, videos, family events, etc.). Sharing holiday practices and traditions can be a meaningful exchange for both staff and persons with dementia.
 
v Consider the noise level and alleviate  distractions.  Increased activity and visits to a person’s home or long-term care residence can be overwhelming.
 
v Be sensitive to family members who can no longer celebrate the holidays as they once did.  Provide opportunities for persons with dementia and their families to celebrate the holidays together through shared family activities and programs.
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